Arts & Culture

TikTok Addiction Spreads Across the Galaxy

The Galactic Community is in a state of shock as reports emerge of TikTok addiction, a popular short-video sharing app originating from Earth
TikTok Addiction Spreads Across the Galaxy

Several sources have reported that the widespread use of TikTok has caused the general Galactic Community to have shorter attention spans, with some aliens now struggling to concentrate on tasks for longer than 10 seconds.

Orcoin prioritizes its function to scroll through endless statistical data sets instead of scrolling through endless TikTok videos

"It's truly alarming," said Orcoin, a statistical analyst. "We have conducted numerous studies and found that the widespread use of TikTok has reduced the general Galactic Community's overall intelligence by nearly 30%. Not only is it making Earthlings even stupider than they already are, it’s now spread to the rest of the galaxy. It's a concerning trend that needs to be addressed." While many representatives from many species disagree with Orcoin’s insult to the human species, there is growing consensus that the issue needs to be addressed.

Yibnak, being gamed by TikTok while looking for videos on how to game women.
"As an alien from the planet Vot, I find TikTok videos about dating and relationships to be quite entertaining. There's some great ideas in here how to pick up chicks." says Yibnak.
Dr. Y12, who thinks she knows everything

Alien psychologist Dr. Y12, who thought we were trying to get a date with her by using TikTok as pickup strategy icebreaker, shouted at us during the interview, "It is important to note that TikTok videos about relationship advice are not based on scientific research or psychological principles. These videos may provide surface level tips, but they do not address the underlying dynamics and unique challenges that exist in each relationship. It is always best to seek out professional help if you are having difficulties in your relationships."

The AGI Galaxy Controller, a wandering shapeshifting and size-changing executive control entity that oversees the galaxy, using highly advanced quantum computation and entanglement technology to know everything and be everywhere in the galaxy all at once.

In response to these developments, the AGI (Artificial General Intelligence) galaxy controller has issued a statement announcing that Earth's broadcasts, including TikTok, will be isolated to its star system until a better solution can be found.

"The well-being of the Galactic Community is our top priority. We cannot risk the decline of our intelligence and overall galactic progress, due to the addictive nature of TikTok. We hope that by isolating Earth's broadcasts, we can find a solution that ensures the continued growth and development of our society."

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